If you’ve found your way here because you’re grieving the loss of someone or something important to you, I’m deeply sorry for your loss. I hope this space offers even a small sense of understanding or comfort.
Maybe you are anticipating the loss of someone or something too.
Grief can feel overwhelming, disorienting, and isolating. As a bereavement counsellor with both professional training and personal experience of loss, I want you to know you are not alone.
Inspired by the work of Mary-Frances O’Connor author of ‘The Grieving Brain’ [1]
What are grief and bereavement?
Grief is the emotional response to losing someone, or something, important. While we often associate grief with death, it can also arise from many types of loss: the end of a relationship, moving home, failing an exam, losing a friendship, or even a sense of identity.
Mourning is the outward expression of grief : the process we go through to adjust and adapt.
Bereavement refers specifically to the state of having lost someone or something close to us.
As Psychologist J. William Worden explains in his book [2], these experiences are not just events but ongoing processes. Over a lifetime, we may encounter grief many times, and each experience can look and feel different.
Grief may arise from:
- The death of a loved one
- Life transitions or changes (please see more info here in my blog 4)
- Unexpected or sudden losses
- Major identity shifts or existential crises
And it can show up in many forms: sadness, shock, anxiety, anger, numbness, guilt confusion or even relief.
How grief might feel for you
If you are grieving or anticipating grief, your emotional world might feel like a rollercoaster, swinging between moments of intense emotion, numbness, or exhaustion. Joy may feel out of reach. Life may feel unrecognisable. You might feel lost, disoriented, or as if your inner compass has disappeared.
Grief can affect not just your emotions but your physical well-being. You may be fatigued, have changes in appetite, sleep disturbances, and difficulty concentrating.
You might notice others struggle to understand your pain. Even well-meaning words or attempts to cheer you up may feel invalidating.
Sometimes we can feel ashamed of our grief or believe we’re ‘not grieving the right way’. But there is no right way. Grieving is as individual as a fingerprint.
My own experience
I have personal experience of grief, particularly through miscarriage, which left me feeling disoriented and with a deep sense of injustice. At times, I felt as though my body had let me, and others down. Through my work with The Miscarriage Association, I’ve had the privilege of supporting many others who’ve gone through similar experiences.
In other parts of my life, I’ve also faced the painful reality of letting go of what once was. Adjusting to new family dynamics and shifting roles brought its own set of challenges. These experiences have given me a deep understanding of how complex and personal grief can be.
How my counselling can help
My counselling offers a calm, supportive space for you to simply be. With all the emotions, contradictions, and questions that grief brings.
In our sessions, I will:
- Sit with you in your grief without judgment
- Offer compassion, presence, and understanding
- Help you process what’s happened or is happening at a pace that feels right for you
- Support you in adapting, however that looks for you
Some days you may feel ready to carry on; other days, you may need to press pause. I will meet you wherever you are.
Therapeutic techniques I use
Every client is different, and I tailor sessions based on what you feel comfortable with. Some of the methods I may use include:
- Talking therapy: my start point which is creating a space for you to speak freely and be heard
- Mindfulness: gentle grounding techniques to help manage overwhelm
- Creative therapies: such as drawing, metaphor work, journalling, or letter writing, to help express feelings that may be hard to articulate with words
Together, we’ll find ways that support you.
Frequently asked questions
How do people grieve?
Everyone experiences grief in their own unique way. While there are some common patterns, how someone grieves often depends on the relationship they had with the person, situation, or loss. Grief can feel like it comes in waves, sometimes catching you by surprise and it can bring a wide mix of emotions.
Can grief make you ill?
Yes, grief can affect your physical health. When you’re grieving, the emotional stress can lower your immune system, making you more susceptible to illness. You might feel physically unwell, exhausted, or just “off.” It’s a deeply disorienting experience and can take a real toll on both your body and mind.
Can grief affect your mental health?
It can. It’s completely normal to feel a range of strong emotions when you’re grieving — sadness, anger, guilt, confusion, or even numbness. Sometimes, these feelings can lead to or worsen conditions like anxiety or depression.
Grief is a natural response to loss, and most people find that over time, those overwhelming emotions start to ease. But if you feel stuck or like things aren’t shifting, it’s okay to reach out for support. Talking to someone in a calm, supportive counselling space can really help you make sense of what you’re feeling. I am here to help you.
What can I expect from counselling for grief?
You can talk about the person who died, how their death is affecting you, and how you are coping. I will help you understand what you are going through and develop coping strategies.
You might want to share how the loss is affecting you, talk about the person who died, or simply express emotions that feel too big to carry alone.
Some people worry they aren’t feeling ‘enough’, while others feel completely overwhelmed — both are okay, and counselling can help you explore those feelings. Together, we can work on understanding your experience and finding ways to cope that feel right for you.
Final thoughts
Grief is a natural, human response to loss of any kind. It is also a testament to love, to connection, and to what mattered.
If you are navigating grief, please know that you don’t have to go through it alone. Whether you are just beginning to acknowledge your loss, or you have been carrying it for some time, I am here when you are ready.
